The day before this appeared in the newspaper, Mark and I were talking about Sailor Dan and his Facebook group. Mark had a lot of encounters with Sailor Dan during the years Mark worked at Grainfields.

SAILOR DAN: A SASKATOON ORIGINAL
Panhandling artist has made a name for himself
David Hutton - The StarPhoenix
Saturday, May 26, 2007

Dan Hicks, known by many as Sailor Dan, sits at a booth in the back corner of a McDonald's, where he comes almost every day.

His red shoes, green socks and yellow corduroy pants are complemented by a shiny dollar sign belt buckle. A worn-down mermaid tattoo is visible below his rolled up sleeves. His coffee sits on the table to his left -- no cream, two scoops of sugar. Directly in front of him is a clean white bristol board. He takes out one of the six black Sharpie pens hooked to his shirt collar, lifts off his fluorescent orange Mickey Mouse hat, slicks back his silver and black hair and begins to draw, one line at a time.

"It's like x's and o's," Hicks said in his gruff voice.

His right hand draws quickly while his left manoeuvres the white board. When he glances up to chat or answer a question his hands keep moving, like clockwork, the work slowly coming in to view, as if he's drawn it a million times, as if the end result was never in question.

Hicks finishes the body, then the sails, then, for good measure, an anchor in the bottom left corner.

Voila, a Sailor Dan original -- a sail boat, the same drawing you've seen a hundred times in Saskatoon, in kitchens, bedrooms, basements and living rooms, behind shop counters and being held up by Dan as he panhandles in front of this store and that.

Everybody knows Sailor Dan. At least that's what everybody tells you. There's even a group on Facebook, the social networking website, dedicated to him called Friends of Sailor Dan, which has more than 900 members trading stories, memories and sailboat sightings.

"I'll never forget seeing Sailor Dan running across Broadway in leather chaps and a leather vest and then the next day he was in full sailor garb . . . he's such an awesome guy!" says one post. "We picked him up once and took him to a party. He ate all of our raw hot dogs and then left," says another.

When Hicks sees the site for the first time, his bad vision forcing him to squint at the screen, he's astonished.

"A guy like me has all these friends," he said, smiling in disbelief. "It's like waking up and it's your birthday."

At a concert at Lydia's pub earlier this month, the frontman for the Apostles of Hustle started describing a guy he'd seen outside before the show. Before he could finish the anecdote, the crowd yelled out, in unison, "Sailor Dan."

In Saskatoon, "there really isn't anybody that does what he does," says "Kiwi," Dan's close friend, Kerwin Hein. "In Toronto or Vancouver, lots of guys are doing what he does. In Saskatoon, he's a novelty, he sticks out like a sore thumb."

Along his regular route, down Eighth Street to Broadway Avenue and back, he receives nods and hellos from the workers of almost every store. At the PetroCan gas station, one of his more frequent stops, some of the staff consider him a good friend.

"If I went somewhere else," Dan says, "nobody would know me."

The 53-year-old Hicks lives in a duplex just off Seventh Street in the unfinished basement of his friend, Judy Porter, and her son, Darrell, who took him in 10 years ago to help them pay the rent. Before landing at the Porters', Hicks jumped from place to place around the Broadway area.

The Porters' house is full of Sailor Dan originals and other navy and sailboat paintings and paraphernalia. He calls the basement his "treasure hold." A large cast iron ship stands out among the random assortment of sombrero hats and Mickey Mouse lamps and a clothing line strung directly above his bed.

"He's awful messy," Porter said, laughing. "He's given me a few drawings . . . but you get kind've sick of looking at them after awhile, they're all the same ship!"

Hicks says he's been drawing since he was a young child or, in his words, a "bathtub admiral."

He focused on shop in high school, was always good with his hands, and joined the navy when he was 18, he says. His stint only lasted two years, but the memories are ingrained in his psyche.

"I don't like the water," he said sternly with a pirate accent. "I like the boats in 'em."

His influences are Walt Disney and Norman Rockwell, he says. He began selling the sailboat drawings on napkins until a friend recommended the bristol board. The most he's ever received is $20 for one that he motions was "almost life size." He once sold a drawing to Brent Butt, his only famous customer, and looks for it on the show whenever he watches. Hicks isn't getting rich on the drawing and on a good day he'll sell one, maybe two, but the meagre income helps him survive.

"If he's doing good," Kiwi said, "he helps out people in the neighbourhood that aren't doing as good. He's the most kind man I know."

His family, with whom he rarely speaks, is scattered throughout Saskatchewan and Alberta.

"I'm the black sheep," he says. "But this whole town is my family. I'm like Saskatoon's orphan son."

Sailor Dan is a town icon, a part of the landscape, but he isn't everyone's best friend. Street artists and part-time panhandlers like him rarely are. Some people are uncomfortable, annoyed, or, at least, don't know what to make of him.

He shaved his beard at New Year's, but shaving takes up too much time, so he's growing it back. In front of PetroCan, many of the customers look right through him, unwilling to make eye contact. Business owners and store managers, who have to abide by city bylaws, often boot him off their premises.

"Sometimes he gets a little rowdy," said Jay Weiland, one of Dan's friends from PetroCan. "He fits into the saying, 'Give a mouse a crumb, and he'll demand a muffin.' But he always makes you feel like you're somebody."

Hicks has learned how to avoid the manager's shifts at many places, though, and his rapport with staff means he's always welcome at most businesses on his route.

"He's pretty friendly for a guy who talks like a sailor," says Chuck Hamilton, who spent three days with Hicks for a high-school documentary. "It's an aspect of society people aren't confronted with a lot. It's great that he can making living hanging out on social assistance, selling his sailboats."

He's not an aggressive salesman, either. Most businesses have embraced him as a part of doing business here, a familiar face, and a minor celebrity in a city without major celebrities. Toronto has squeegie kids, Saskatoon has Sailor Dan.

"Every day's a holiday," Dan said. "That's why I never leave town."

dhutton@sp.canwest.com

© The StarPhoenix (Saskatoon) 2007

Here are more "Marvel VS. D.C." commercials, courtesy of YouTube:

The other day at work, I wanted to document that I gave a girl six condoms for a weekend pass to the lake with her boyfriend and some friends. My co-workers all got a laugh out of what I really wrote:

I gave (name) sex condoms for her weekend pass.

That's what they call "a Freudian slip" ...

After two weeks in the making, here is my review of Spiderman 3. I went with a big group on Friday, May 4th, and loved it - but then again, I'm biased. I was so glad I caught up on the first two that afternoon!

CAUTION: CONTAINS SPOILERS!
The whole movie is about vengence, and how it can be like a poison: Peter is trying to take revenge on Flint Marko (A.K.A.: Sandman) for killing Ben Parker ... Harry Osborne is trying to get revenge on Spiderman for killing Norman Osborne (A.K.A.: The Green Goblin) ... Eddie Brock is trying to take revenge on Peter Parker for ruining his career and stealing his girlfriend, Gwen Stacey. Peter is also getting more cocky and self-assured as the city of New York begins to accept and praise Spiderman for his efforts. Spidey's black symbiote suit enhances his aggression and arrogance, turning Peter into an emo-goth jerk.

Unfortunately, it does nothing to improve his dancing or teach him how to flirt with women without looking like Steve Urkel. Everyone was saying how this movie was supposed to be so much more "dark" than the first two. It was, but there was also a huge amount of goofy slapstick for comic relief, which sometimes got to be too much.

The movie also further follows the relationship of Peter Parker and Mary Jane Watson, which has progressed to the point where Peter has decided to propose to MJ. I thought that Aunt May offering her engagement ring was very touching, showing that she hopes that Peter and Mary Jane will have many happy years together, just as May and Ben did. Who do either Peter or MJ have to look to as relationship role models aside from May and Ben Parker? Not Peter's parents, who died before he could know them. Not the Watsons' abusive relationship, which the whole neighbourhood was witness to. I'm sure Harry's parents weren't happily married either, judging from Norman's general attitude about women and workaholic nature in Spiderman.

Also, Peter is not exactly making Harry Osborne money in the superhero/freelance photography business, so I'm sure getting a free second-hand engagement ring doesn't hurt. Besides, MJ already has her wedding dress from leaving J. Jonah's son John at the alter in Spiderman 2!

However, as Peter's star is rising, the curtain is closing on MJ - at least for one Broadway role - and Peter doesn't seem to notice. Mary Jane also becomes jealous of Peter's classmate, Gwen Stacey, who Spiderman saves and publically kisses. In the comic books, Gwen was sweet and smart, and I think that is how they should have kept it. In the movie, she is a self-absorbed fashion model who Peter describes as not especially studious.

I also found it ironic that, in real life, Kirsten Dunst (MJ) is a blonde and Bryce Dallas Howard (Gwen) is a redhead ...

Spiderman 3 has three villans: Venom, the Sandman, and The Green Goblin: Version 2.0. The movie starts with Harry and Peter estranged due to Harry's anger at Spiderman and discovery that Spidey and Peter are one in the same. Harry re-invents and resurrects the Green Goblin, getting even further away from the original costume. What was the point of casting Willm Dafoe as Gobbey if they were just going to put him in a metal mask? His face was so perfect for that role, he only needed make-up!!! Now Harry is on a flying snowboard with a visor and goggles! It is a cool costume, but I personally prefer the old-school Goblin look.

For a brief time, Harry gets amnesia and turns into a beter friend to Peter and Mary Jane than he ever was before. Unfortunately, it all has to come to an end, and Harry hatches a plot to force Mary Jane to leave Peter, then rubs it in by saying that Harry and MJ had been having an affair. Peter pays Harry back by reminding him that Norman considered Harry a failure and an embarassment, then hideously deforming half of Harry's face with a pumpkin bomb. Peter later tries to get Harry to help him defeat Venom and Sandman to save MJ, and Harry refuses until his loyal butler, Houseman confesses, "I've seen things in this house that I've never spoke of ... I cleaned your father's wound the night he died, they were from the blades of his own glider. There is no doubt that your father died by his own hand".

Where was that guy two movies ago?!?

Personally, I was not convinced by Harry's sudden and total change of heart. Even though Peter is not to blame for Norman's death, there is still the little matter of Harry's scarred face ... not to mention his scarred psyche after Peter's little, "Your dad never loved you" speech. I would have preferred a temporary partnership, where Harry tells Peter, "I'm doing this for Mary Jane, not you".

Spidey and Gobbey team up against Venom and Sandman, but Harry ends up dying as MJ and Peter weep over his body against the backdrop of the rising sun. I was nearly in tears during Harry's funeral scene, especially when Peter and MJ went their seperate ways following the service and didn't reconcile until the following scene.

Just when you think it's over, it's not over ... and it is revealed that Uncle Ben's real killer is at large. Worse, he gets turned into The Sandman when he hides in a nuclear testing ground.

Just a tip for all you scientists: when you assume, you make an ass out of you and me ... and a mutant out of innocent bystanders.

My favorite part of this plotline was that they showed the scene where Flint kills Uncle Ben repeatedly, changing it each time according to the person's perceptions of Flint's actions. In the end, I really felt sorry for Flint, and saw him as a man, not just a monster. I believed that Peter would forgive him, although Flint seemed to still not forgive himself. I wished that Peter would have offered to help Flint's sick daughter in some way. Mark liked that Flint had to adjust to the changes in his body chemistry and learn to use his powers, rather than jump up totally capable right after the experiment. However, he pointed out that fact that Flint is wearing the same clothes when he kills Uncle Ben that he changes into and wears for the entire movie. I don't know about you, but if I had to pick an outfit, I'd pick the one I was wearing the day I made the biggest mistake of my life ... especially if police were trying to identify me and only had one picture of me, probably wearing that very distinctive shirt.

As much as I had doubts about Topher Grace playing Eddie Brock, I thought that the origin scene of Venom was very well done. I also liked that they included foreshadowing when Peter tells Eddie, "You want redemption? Go find religion". Eddie comes to the church looking for revenge rather than forgiveness, and gets more than he bargained for. I liked the way the bell started ringing as soon as Eddie prays for Peter Parker to be killed, as if he was to take turning into Venom as a sign from God. I also thought it was funny that Eddie addressed Jesus as "Sir".

Venom has always terrified me, right back to the days when I was still collecting
comics. I think it's the razor-sharp maniacal grin. I was trying to remember if Venom made that velociraptor-like scream on the 90s cartoon series, or if I imagined him that way. It seemed to fit and was extremely chilling. I had forgotten than sound waves effect Venom negatively, and was wondering how Peter would ever beat him. However, I was disappointed that Venom died at the end of the movie. How will they ever facilitate Carnage's origin without Venom? (Maybe they don't plan to, but I'm wondering if some of the old school villans will get passed over for flashier recent additions.) The best part of the old cartoon and the comics was that hardly anyone died ... except for friends and family of Spiderman. Villans were just beaten into submission and left to eventually resurface.

Stan Lee finally got a good cameo. In the original movie, he was supposed to be selling sunglasses out of a case, and call out to Peter Parker, "Do you want to buy a pair of these? They're the kind they wore in the X-Men!", but that ended up on the cutting room floor. In both Spiderman and Spiderman 2, Stan was only seen for a split second pushing children out of the way of debris. In 2, I think he got to say, "Look out!". In this one, he walks up to Peter and, as they both look at a marque that say Spiderman will be getting the key to the city, Stan says, "I guess one man can make a difference. 'Nuff said". I knew it was him as soon as I saw the back of his head! Excelsior, Stan!

My favorite quote from this movie came when Peter is trying to return the ring to Aunt May, saying that he is not ready to propose, he has hurt Mary Jane and he doesn't know what to do:

"You start by doing the hardest thing, you forgive yourself. I believe in you, Peter. You're a good person, and I know you'll find a way to put it right ... in time."

But, of course, it is no match for:

"WITH GREAT POWER, COMES GREAT RESPONSIBILITY ..."

Last night, I watched the final episode of The Price is Right before Bob Barker retires. I have to say I wasn't thrilled.

I think I expected more of a fanfare. The one showcase did claim to reflect "Bob's Illustrious Career", but that was about all. You'd think Bob would at least forego his usual sign-off of "Help control the pet population. Have your pets spayed or neutered" to say, "goodbye" or "thanks for the memories" ... or maybe, "Tonight, just let your pets do it!!!".

I used to watch The Price is Right when I was in elementary school. I remember the people being excited, but not manic, which appeared to be the trend last night. Are drugging those people up or what?!?

I also really miss the original Price Is Right announcer, Rod Roddy, who God asked to "come on down" (or "up") in October of 2003.

My high school English teacher had an Argus poster up in her classroom with this story on it and a picture of roosters in a barnyard. I never could figure out what it had to do with chickens ... but the story makes a good point, especially if you a "Who's on First?" fan. I was recently reminded of it at my work ... and by recently, I mean daily.

There were four people named Everybody, Somebody, Anybody and Nobody. An important job had to be done and Everybody was sure that Somebody would do it. Anybody could have done it, but Nobody did it. Somebody got angry about that because it was Everybody’s job. Everybody thought that Anybody could do it, but Nobody realized that Somebody wouldn’t do it. It ended up that Everybody blamed Somebody when Nobody did what Anybody could have done.

This week, I attended the Bells of Hope Conference: Reality of Human Trafficking, sponsored by Communities for Children and NASHI. I was sent there by my work, so my main objective was to gather information on local resources for teenage girls at risk. However, I also learned a great deal about international human trafficking, especially in the Ukraine.

"Clearly, no single country or institution can effectively combat this scourge alone. What is needed is a firm resolve and an unequivocal commitment from around the globe to tackle this problem."
-Victor Malarek, The Natashas: Inside the New Global Sex Trade

This is a video made by the United Nations, shown as part of the presentation by Constable Elsen J. Sutherlang of the North West Region Immigration and Passport Section of the R.C.M.P.:


This video's portrayl of the grim reality of human trafficking literally gave me chills. Worst of all, the statements are ones which appear in job ads which anyone would be compelled to answer.

Often, the people who recruit these girls are trusted members of the community. The girl and her parents are led to believe she will work as a housekeeper, nanny or maid, then return having gained education and job skills. In reality, their passports are taken, and they are sold by organized crime syndicates, sometimes many times over. They are forced to work in brothels, forced labour camps or used for black market organ transplants.

I was even more suprised to learn that human trafficking is happening within Canada, where girls are being abducted from Quebec or from their reservations and sent to large cities to become sex workers.

I was not aware of NASHI before this weekend, but it is a group based out of Saskatoon of people who are attempting to divert children of Ukraine from the sex trade and to raise awareness of Christian Child Care International. CCCI is a Canadian sponsorship program based in Springhill, N.S., which cares for needy children and families in over 20 countries.

Last year, a dozen NASHI volunteers travelled to Lviv, Ukraine to make presentations and to work in the Trade School they have created. This school now teaches sewing and offers access to computers. They are currently attempting to purchase a bus to bring children to the Trade School from the surrounding areas and to establish a Safe House for children and adults threatened by the sex trade. The group also visited their sponsored children, and repaired and renovated the home of a family who had black mold and no kitchen. They also purchased a new sofa bed for this family for their four daughters to sleep in.

Coincidentally, my grandparents came from Lviv, which makes the stories of what is happening there even more meaningful. If not for circumstances and privilege, I could have been one of these unfortunate young women.

To learn more about or donate to NASHI, go to http://www.nashi.ca.

I really want to see the upcoming Robin Williams movie Licence to Wed, where he plays a minister giving marriage preparation classes to Mandy Moore and John Krasinski. It looks hilarious! I especially enjoyed his Family Feud-style "Commandment Challenge" game he was playing with the confirmation students, with titles such as:

Dad & Mom are the Bomb

God is #1

Cussin' the Man is Outta Hand

Sunday is God's Fun Day

Say NO to Envy

It Ain't Neat to Cheat

Keep it Real - Don't Steal

It Ain't Fly to Lie

Covet? Don't Love It

These are a parody of the "I'm a Mac ... and I'm a P.C." commercials, featuring a Superman and a Spiderman action figure talking about Marvel and D.C. comics. Pretty funny ... especially since I love Spidey and like to "Make Mine Marvel!".









A few more, where Batman puts Spidey in his place ...

Free Comic Book Day is tomorrow (also known as the first Saturday in May to those who aren't as cool as myself ...). You can pick up your free comic book in Saskatoon at Amazing Stories Comics (Bay 6, 3110 8th Street East) or 8th Street Books and Comics (1010 8th Street East).

Spiderman will also be making an appearance at Amazing Stories from 2 PM to 4 PM ... and simultaneously at the Sony Store in Midtown Plaza from 11 AM to 5 PM.

Like a streak of light, he arrives just in time.
Spiderman, Spiderman ...

... friendly neighborhood Spiderman.

Wealth and fame, he's ignored.

Action is his reward.


Check out www.freecomicbookday.com to find out more details.

Tonight is the night! I have tickets to go see Spiderman 3 at 8 PM at the Galaxy. This afternoon, I am going to have a Spiderman 1 and 2 marathon at my place. I watched the most recent preview online today, and it looks awesome! I am so excited!!!

Check back for my review later on this weekend ...

Today I participated in a lefse-making bee, which took place at my former church. Mark heard about it through his Norweigian language class, so we both decided to check it out and learn a new ... or rather, old ... skill. I knew most of the people there from the congregation, so felt right at home, despite being the only Ukrainian in the crowd. Working together in a big assembly line reminded me of being back home on the farm ... except, in Cando, we had cabbage roll and perogie-making bees instead!

Lefse is a traditional soft Norwegian flatbread made out of potato, milk or cream and flour, and cooked on a griddle. It is usually rolled up with butter and sometimes cinnamon and sugar. Lompe are a smaller potato and flour lefse used to roll up a hotdog and onions. Mark mixed or rolled the dough for 1100 lompe tonight!

The lefse and lompe we were making today were to be frozen for sale at Folkfest. The bee will go one for two more days at Zion Lutheran church to make enough to sell at the Norwegian pavillion. I have purchased lefse there in the past, but today I had my first piece made fresh, and it was a real treat.

Speaking of being the only Ukrainian in an all German/Norwegian crowd, check back daily for your "Lutheran Tidbit of the Day" from OldLutheran.com:




Old Lutheran: The Centre for Lutheran Pride! (but not too proud)