Some of you might remember my post of Christian Pick-up Lines several years ago. Apparently, if I plan to enter seminary, I need to step up my game.

I recently received the list below:

• Nice Bible.


• Is this pew taken?


• I just don't feel called to celibacy.


• For you I would slay two Goliaths.


• I would go through more than Job for you.


• You are perfect, except with all the sin.


• When Moses struck the rock, water flowed from it like a river: I promise I will never strike you.


• You are so unblemished that I would sacrifice you.


• What, this here? Oh ... that's my Study Bible. It's a little bigger, but I can handle the extra spiritual and physical weight.


• Shall we tithe?


• At points in my life I have been referred to as Samson.


• The word says 'Give drink to those who are thirsty, and feed the hungry'; how about dinner?


• I didn't believe in predestination until tonight.


• I'm not like those other Christ Church guys.


• I believe one of my ribs belongs to you?


• I went on a mission, but all I ended up doing was mission' you.


• I can be your Boaz.


• My spiritual gift is my good looks: it lifts people's spirits.


• I sacrifice my Sunday mornings to look after the nursery. It's tough ... but I love children.


• Is this the transfiguration ... because you are glowing!


• I have a job and I'm willing to move out of home.


• Mark Driscoll takes up 35% of my Ipod memory.


• I would work seven years for your sister ... but I would work seven more years for you.


• Hey good looking: Ecclesiastes 4:11!


• I often throw clothes into the samaritan bin.


• Bible Gateway happens to be my homepage.


• Marry me.


• Can I buy you a non-alcoholic beverage?


• I have many sponsor children: one in each developing nation.


• I'm one of the fortunate ones: Greek and Hebrew come pretty easily to me.


• My favourite species of vegetation is the church plant.


• Did I just have mud rubbed in my eyes?


• What's an Xbox?


• Now I know why Solomon had 700 wives: because he never met you.


• I used to believe in natural theology, but since I met you I've converted to divine revelation.


• I look after widows.


• Is that a thinline, duo-tone, compact ESV Travel Bible in your pocket?


• Why don't I have a Bible dictionary? Well, I don't really need it.


• Bathsheba had nothing on you.


• You put the 'cute' back in persecution.


• Your hair is like a flock of goats descending from Gilead.


• Can I clothe you in righteousness?


• How many times do I have to walk around you to make you fall for me?


• How would you like to join my Purpose Driven Life?"


• If you say no, I will rip out my hair and my beard.


• If you say no, I'm going to tear my clothes, get in my sackcloth and rub dust into my head.


• If you say no, I'm going on a pilgrimage.


• Unfortunately, I can't perform miracles and I've only got enough bread and fish for two people.


• My parents are home. You wanna come over?


• Let me remove my sandals before I come any closer.


• Let's say, hypothetically, you were married: I would send your husband to the front line against the Amorites.


• It's obvious to me that you sprouted from the good kinda soil.


• Feel free to meet me at the threshing floor.


• You can lie at my feet.


• I know its absurd, but every time I walk towards you, it feels like I'm being lead to Bethlehem.


• If I had to choose between a romantic date with you or a night with the fellas ... I would sit at home and read my Bible.


• I really like your spirituality; it goes well with that shirt.


• Welcome to the Christian family: the only family where brothers and sisters can marry each other.


• I did a love tester on your name and mine: it came back 'predestined'.


• You're totally depraved but I'd still like to go out with you.


• You can come crash at my place tonight. I have a separate room prepared.


• I'm a Proverbs 32 kind of guy and you're a Proverbs 31 kinda woman.


• I'm interested in full time ministry, and not only that: I also play the guitar.


• You really have to watch out for that man of lawlessness ... but don't worry: I'm not him, so you're safe with me.


• If we were around with Noah ... you and me? Pair.


• I arrange the substantial Christian section of my bookshelf into alphabetical order. Coffee?


• I sit with my mom at church.


• Let me sell you an indulgence, because it's a sin to look as good as you do.


• Solomon had 700 wives. You can be my second girlfriend ... but bring your friends.


• I have a Bible verse tattoo. It's permanent. It's also in ancient Greek.


• I consider myself to be a fisher of women: this would be referred to as "casting my net".


• I'm pretty much considered an elder in the congregation these days.


• It would be my honor to present you spotless on the last day.


• Me. You. Song of Songs: the remix.


• When I read Philippians 4:8, I think about you.


• I would leave 99 sheep to come and find you ... and then I would carry you home joyfully on my shoulder.


• I prayed up at the front at church tonight.


• I'm developing the newest form of SingStar: hymns and songs of worship.


• Look, you're nearly 22. Most Christians are three years into marriage by now: just settle for me.


• I come from Egypt: the same place Moses lived.


• My general Biblical knowledge is quite vast, probably because I finished Bible Trivia as a child.


• Who's your favorite apostle?


• You make the Queen of Sheba look like a hobo.


• I have familiarized myself with all five love languages: in fact, I invented four of them.


• Let's go for a ride in my Zondervan.


• Have you died before? That looks like a resurrection body to me.


• All I'm looking for is a Godly woman. I don't care that you're not attractive.


• You float my ark.


• Do you need prayer? I am certainly willing to lay hands on you.


• As Shammah the son of Agee a Hararite protected the field of lentils, so I wish to protect you.


• You make me want to be a better Christian.


• I will never give you reason to hammer a tent peg through my skull.


• I predicted David over Goliath: now I'm betting on you and me.


• If you were staying for the tribulation, I would consider staying too ... but then I would probably leave.


• If you were a leper, I would still hold your hand ... even if it wasnt attached.


• I would have asked you out to dinner, but I just put all my money in the offeratory basket.


• Hi, I'm Calvin. You were meant to choose me.


• Unlike the Israelites, who forgot the Lord, I will remember your name most of the time.


• You are a Galations 5 fruit salad.


• I mentioned you in my testimony.


• Can you make your decision? I'm keen to build a commemorative altar and Home Depot is closing in 15 minutes.


• The perseverance of the saints is well illustrated by the amount of time I spend talking to you.


• The Lord Jesus was into carpentry: I'm doing an apprenticeship.


• If you were my wife, I would never make you pretend to be my sister. That would be too damaging to my reputation.


• I would bring your father twelve-hundred Philistine foreskins for just one date with you.


• I've been called the 11th Plague of Egypt: Boogie Fever.


• Are you Pentecostal? I would really like to speak in tongues with you.


• Do you know what the difference is between going to church and making out? No? Wanna go to church with me?


• Can I put my Bible next to your Bible?


• Didn't I see you singing to the shepherds when Jesus was born?


• Didn't Solomon write a song about you?